Let Me Be Your Killer King

wastedwaves:

me flirting: hey wanna date a fucking failure?

(Source: thats-the-teen-spirit, via werealljustfucked)

thecommonchick:

dad: why are you drinking coffee at 10pm?

me: time is an illusion. once you realize that, you can transcend, and live in bliss

me: *takes sip*

me: also i have a 10 page paper due in the morning that i haven’t started

(Source: sunpuppies, via thecommonchick)

disasterful:

Me: needs dick asap but also attention, emotional support, understanding, loving care, mental stimulation, but really dick.

(Source: heterosexually, via plasmidsongbird)